For this week’s Retro Fri-Dave I thought that instead of reliving the old days of gaming, I would write you a poem.

'Twas the night before Fri-Dave, when all through the mall
Everybody was shopping, balls to the wall.

The gift cards were sold by the millions this year,
In the hope that huge profits soon would appear.
The children were nestled with NDS in hand,
While visions of Zelda danced cross the land.

And mama with her guitar, and sticks in my hand,
Had just settled down to play some Rock Band,
When from the living room there arose such a clatter,
I looked all around to see what was the matter.

The sound we were hearing was really quite odd,
We knew in an instant we needed CigDangle’s Mod.
The drum pads: we cut them and fit them just right,
And rocked on quietly the rest of the night.

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
It was 6 o’clock in the morning and we were out of beer.
With gift cards in hand we had to drive quick,
I knew in a moment the crowds would be thick.

More rapid than eagles the shoppers they came.
They  whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
"Now, PSP! Now 360! Now PS2 and 3!
On Xbox! On PC! On NDS and Wii!”

To Big Box Stores, outlets and the mall we all went!
Our cash we were using until it was spent!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
We shopped and shopped till our credit was dry.

So on to the shop to swap our old games,
With the hope of getting some brand new names.
And then, in a twinkling, we headed back home
To fire up WoW and level up our gnome.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,
a Level 70 Mage came at me with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A wand of fire he was wielding and a sword on his back,
And he looked at me and started to attack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! And with a flick of his wrist,
His fire wand hit me and ended my quest!

I gave up on WoW and fired up FreeCell,
I figured against the computer I just might fare well.
My fingers were numb and there was fuzz on my teeth,
But victory at FreeCell was with in my reach.

My wife was sleepy and I was quite smelly,
I found I had food crumbs all over my belly.
I had killed her in WoW and Call of Duty,
I knew right then I would be getting no booty.

A look in her eye and a twist of her head,
Soon gave me to know I had everything to dread.
She spoke not a word, but gave me a smirk,
Then gritted her teeth and called me a jerk.

And laying her controller down and scratching her nose,
And giving a nod, up from her chair she rose.
She sprang to her feet, to the kids gave a whistle,
And away they flew to their bedrooms like the down of a thistle.

But I heard her exclaim, as she walked out of sight,
"Happy gaming to all, and to all a good-night."

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